I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
