I CAN MOONWALK!
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Randomize
