Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
