if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
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