Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
