Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize