When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
