so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
