i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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