The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I just forgot I was standing up.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
