What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
