It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I think a kid would responsible me up
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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