Whod you bang
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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