I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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