We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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