Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
