I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize
