quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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