and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
