Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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