There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Randomize
