is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
