this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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