The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
