I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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