oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Randomize
