I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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