I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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