1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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