he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
