Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
We're too hungover to prance.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
