At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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