I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
