He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
