And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
