just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
