Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
