and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
