Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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