kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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