oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
We have so much sex to catch up on
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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