just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
