Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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