Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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