I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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