is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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