Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
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