dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize