I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
