just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
